Should I sacrifice my dream college for my boyfriend?

I'm a junior living in Oklahoma and I really want to go to Stanford or another out of state private school. My boyfriend of two years, really wants me to stay close to home and go to either UCO or OU He's already in college and will be a junior at UCO. I have confidence our relationship, but would staying close to home be sacrificing too much? I want to get a forensic psychology degree and I know I can most likely get into these schools based on my grades, test scores, activities, and essay writing capabilities.


Or alternatively I would like to some sort of child psychology. The only other factor to consider would be college athletics. I want to continue to play volleyball in college and I wouldn't get that opportunity at Stanford because I'm simply not good enough. I am getting a possible recruitment opportunity with UCO though.

Update 2:

This could have been confusing but my boyfriend is currently a college freshman, he will be a junior when I graduate. He is a year and 2 months older than me.

16 Answers

  • Anonymous
    4 weeks ago

    My boyfriend and I first got together when we were 13, in 8th grade. We had some personal issues throughout high school and didn't stay together.

    We remained best friends after high school and through college.

    We are now 25 and living together, planning on getting married after we both finish college.

    Don't put your education on hold for anyone but yourself. If it's meant to be, it WILL be.

  • 1 month ago

    If you get somewhere big go somewhere big. Or make the sacrifice to go to the same school as him my girlfriend made the sacrifice to be with me and it worked out.

  • 1 month ago

    No you have to find your calling your life can't be just about a man or person cause we die people come and go if you defer your dream you will end bitter hating him for it 

  • Lili
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    This decision is yours alone, not your boyfriend's.  Only you can decide where you should go to school, and that decision should not be made on the basis of a teenage relationship. Period.  You could easily choose to remain near your boyfriend and then end up breaking up with him, because most teenage relationships don't last. Then where would you be?

    If you are as bright as you seem to think you are, that should have occurred to you.

    Note that getting into an elite university requires rather more than just good grades, high test scores and writing ability.  Virtually every applicant will boast all that. You will need to look unique, special, different, to stand out from the crowd. How do you plan to do that?

    As far as your major is concerned (wherever you attend school), as an undergraduate, you would simply be majoring in Psychology. You'd specialize in a particular branch of psychology on the graduate level.  Professional psychologists normally hold doctorates.

    I attended Yale and Penn myself and hold a PhD.  I do know what I'm talking about.

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  • 1 month ago

    Lol @ Cathy's answer. No, live your life and seek your goals. If you two are meant to be together, then your relationship can handle college

  • 1 month ago

    Teenagers should NEVER follow a boy- or girl-friend to college. EVER.  If the two of. you are meant to be together, you can weather a couple of years apart.  Thousands of couples do. Most high school romances end. Compromising your own dreams because your current boyfriend doesn't want you to go out of state is foolish.  

    Apply to several schools. Including OU, if you want. If Stanford is your dream school. by all means apply -- just don't apply ED.  As long as you don't apply Early Decision, you don't have to attend if you don't want to.  That will give you time and options.  The key to your future is going to be attending the best university for YOU.  A school that fits you in terms of academics, campus culture, post-grad employment, etc.

    Stanford might not be the best fit for you, so don't just blindly apply to a school with a 4% admissions rate because you've heard the name.  Figure out what attributes of a school are important to you.  For example, size, class size, research opportunities, housing options, distance from home, costs, extracurricular activities, and weather.

    You might find that UT-Austin, Rice, Notre Dame, UChicago, Northwestern, or several other universities might be closer to home yet still provide you with the education you want. 

  • John
    Lv 6
    1 month ago

    In this particular case, I would recommend you proceed with your Stanford/out-of-state college plans.  The reason is because, if I am reading your message correctly, you are in high school and he is 4 years older than you are. Regardless of how good a match the 2 of you are now, you are both at an age at which you are undergoing rapid personality growth.  In 6 to 12 months there is a good chance you will be different people than you are now.  Its just a natural part of the growth process..  

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    Elizabeth, if you're accepted at a first-tier elite school like Stanford, that's where you will get a substantially better education than anything available in your entire state. (Sorry, Oklahomans, but all your schools offer is a good education.) A degree from a prestigious college or university opens doors no UCO or OU degree can, from work to graduate school.

    Sacrificing the direction of the rest of your adult life *is* too much. Allow me to repeat what weddings proclaim. Love is patient. If you two are truly in love, your love will weather a separation for you to be at Stanford (or another elite school), coming back to Oklahoma and him only a few times a year. If it isn't love, then one of you will lose interest, break it off, or cheat.

    But please, don't limit the options your life has at this moment for anyone else, not even your One True Love.

  • Marty
    Lv 4
    1 month ago

    Go to your dream college.  I would hope your boyfriend loves you enough to want you to be happy. If this is a serious relationship then it will survive you being away, if it isn't then you haven't lost your dream along with a relationship. This is the time in your life when its important to be selfish and do what's best for you.

  • fcas80
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    I don't think Stanford offers forensic psychology.

    Nevertheless, attend your dream college.  If your relationship survives, you have your school and him.

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