Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsEngagements & Weddings · 1 month ago

Should I be upset that my bestfriend has the same engagement ring as me?

Context: My boyfriend and I went engagement ring shopping and picked a ring out that we both liked a couple months ago. He has yet to propose. 

My bestfriends boyfriend messaged me a couple days ago and said hes going to pop the question! I'm excited for them but after him showing me the ring he bought her, I noticed its the exact same ring I have. He said he plans on proposing this weekend. 

Am I just being jealous or am I having valid feelings for being annoyed that she has the same ring and is getting proposed to first

22 Answers

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  • 1 month ago

    If you buy a ring in a store and don't go the customized route, you are going to wind up with the same ring has other women. It's kind of weird that you've had a ring for at least a couple months but not actually been proposed to, I think the annoyance might be that your friend's boyfriend is doing things in a more logical manner: buying a ring and then proposing. While you are perfectly aware that you have a ring sitting around waiting for your boyfriend to decide to propose. Whatever your feelings are, they are valid, you get to feel how you feel. Just be mindful you don't let those feelings damage your relationships. 

  • 1 month ago

    Your boyfriend proposed to both you and your best friend with the same ring?  Just share the ring with her.  She can have it every other day or something like that.

  • John P
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Why would you be upset?

    Things must be different these days. In my young days, either the man popped the question, then the ring was bought if she said 'yes'. Or a man simultaneously produced a ring and popped the question.

    The idea of buying the ring (together) and then waiting a month or more before popping the question seems ludicrous to me.

  • Foofa
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    People who want their rings to be unique and shared by no one else have to pay to have a custom jeweler design and make the ring. You can't fault someone you consider a best friend for having the same taste in jewelry you do. You probably share a lot of aesthetic tastes with this person. 

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  • 1 month ago

    Sounds like you’re really just annoyed that your boyfriend still hasn’t proposed to you and seeing the same ring being given to someone else first, has intensified those feelings. I suggest talking to your boyfriend about this 

  • drip
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    So you and your boyfriend went out shopping for your engagement ring, bought it, but you are not engaged. And it has been over two months since buying the engagement ring together.   Ok.  And now you are mad she is getting engaged first.

    Did your friend’s boyfriend see the ring you bought? Did he deliberately buy the same ring? Sounds like that is a no. 

    Your friend can get engaged at any time they damn well want to. They do not have to wait until you are engaged.  It has been two months since you got an engagement ring, how long to you except them to wait for you two to make it official before they can get engaged???? Do you really feel you must be the one that gets engaged first.  Why can’t she be the one to get engaged first? 

    If you want to be annoyed , be annoyed at your boyfriend for dragging his feet for two months. If you had gotten engaged when you both picked out the ring, which would be rather a normal thing to do, then you would of been wearing the ring for the last two months. Chances are your best friend and her boyfriend would of seen it. And then he wouldn’t of pick the same ring. 

    None of this is your best friend’s fault or her boyfriends fault. 

    As this point you are the only one who knows you both have the same ring. So take it back and pick out a different one. Then you won’t have the same ring.

  • Trish
    Lv 5
    1 month ago

    It is what it is.  Your feelings are only natural but I doubt anyone will empathize with you.    It's ok to voice your feelings but it may be frowned upon when you do.  Talk to your mom or dad about the way you feel because it may upset your fiance.  Good Luck and congratulations.

  • 1 month ago

    Technically - if you and your boyfriend have agreed that you'll be getting married, you're already engaged. He just hasn't given you a ring yet. 

    How would anyone else know what your ring looks like? I mean, you can feel whatever you like, but it won't change anything here. Talk to your boyfriend/fiance.

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    ugh who cares??? is this truly your best friend if this upsets you that much? don't you have other things to think about? you're not even engaged yet! yes, you are jealous. no, your feelings are not valid...

  • edward
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    You’re being childish.  The ring i got my wife was custom so there is no other like it, but i can understand not everyone can afford custom rings but obviously you’re not the only couple who like the ring or the jeweler would only ever sell one.

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