Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsWeddings · 1 month ago

Im not inviting our bridesmaids to my engagement party?

The party is small with only about 60 family members at a little restaurant we don’t feel the need to pay for the bridal party to be there since they already congratulated us. They seem to take slight offense being i am asking for help with my bridal shower and Bach party. Should i re consider ? 

17 Answers

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  • 4 weeks ago

    I cannot imagine you feeling like they're some kind of burden to you, as YOU asked THEM for what is actually a HUGE favor in being BM's in the first place. Yes, you invite them to every single wedding-related event, except for the honeymoon. 

  • 1 month ago

    I would say that a decent number of couples don't know who will be in their bridal party for sure when they first get engaged. If you've already selected and asked people to be part of the wedding party, then it makes sense to include them in the engagement party. How many bridesmaids are you having that you cannot invite them to a party that already has 60 people attending? That's not a small party, that's pretty large. I mean, can you hear what that sounds like, "Well, we already got your attention so we don't need buy you dinner." 

  • Foofa
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    If I was going into debt serving as your bridesmaid and you cut me out of the engagement party I'd quit. You don't seem to understand the extreme sacrifices your bridal party is making just to be part of your wedding. This is pretty close to one of the most crass wedding stories I've ever heard. It's not about congratulating you as the earth revolves around the sun, not you. It's about rewarding people who are paying money for an ugly dress and a hen party they don't even want to go to just so you can have the traditional wedding experience. 

  • Trish
    Lv 5
    1 month ago

    Engagement parties are for your closest family and friends.  I would only invite those you are close to the party.

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  • John P
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    60 is a SMALL party?  Already 'congratulated'? Do you and I have the same meaning for 'congratulated'?

  • 1 month ago

    That would be REALLY weird. 

    I assume you're a troll; otherwise you haven't really got the hang of friendship.

  • drip
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    You do not ask them to help with your bridal shower. Not their obligation. 

    Nor it is their obligation to throw you a bachelorette party.

    IF they choose to have a bachelorette party for you,  they throw it.  Ditto for the bridal shower. 

    My best friend had my daughter’s bridal shower and the groom’s aunts threw a second one.  

    An engagement party is thrown right after the couple gets engaged. It is specifically for getting families from the bride and groom together to meet. It is held before you start planning your wedding party. 

  • 1 month ago

    Don't be surprised when the bridesmaids don't show up for the wedding.

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    There is no obligation to invite the bridal party to an engagement party.   The only "main" rule about the guest list is that everyone invited will also be invited to the wedding. 

    That being said, it's normal for people to take offense when you talk to them about a party that they are not invited to.   That's rude.   

    Asking for a bridal shower or bach party is also horribly rude.   You are not entitled to these events.  If someone volunteers to host them for you, that is a very nice gift.  But if no one volunteers, these parties don't happen.  

    I hope you're just another attention-seeking troll.   

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    And you shouldn't be invited to the Bridal Shower - cheapazz.

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