Anna asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 2 weeks ago

My dad gets in really bad moods and always makes me feel like the worst person ?

My dad gets in terrible moods to the point where he ruins family time for us and whenever I try to discuss it with him it makes matters worse. He tends to blame me and it makes me feel really awful and it’s crushing my self esteem.

For eg. We were going to a gig last night and it was on my mum and dad’s anniversary. I got home really late and he shouted at me to go and get ready I did but he was moody all night. I bought him and my mum drinks for their anniversary and he snubbed them and then was so miserable during the gig and ruined it for us all. I found out the next day it was because I didn’t give them their card until we got home, but he told me to go and get ready when I got in late from work and was stuck in traffic, I just felt so upset and like I had done something wrong. I now feel as though I had ruined the night. 

I don’t know what to do anymore as it is straining my relationship with him.

5 Answers

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  • Pearl
    Lv 7
    2 weeks ago

    i wouldnt go nowheres with him till he changed his moods

  • Ole
    Lv 7
    2 weeks ago

    Say daddy I am the best thing you have in your life dont be so harsh on me.

    Dont worry just share with someone else. People are what they are.

  • Namito
    Lv 7
    2 weeks ago

    It's not an easy situation when a parent is in a bad mood, selfishly judges your behavior inadequate, and blames you.  The really bad news is he likely will not change because he won't discuss it.

    My best advice is to notice when his very poor behavior is present.  You generously bought him and your mum drinks for their anniversary and he snubbed them.  Next year I'd just get them a card and find a way to make your mum feel special when he isn't around, maybe give her the card in the mail and small gift.  He doesn't deserve it.

    I have a parent who selfishly judges my behavior inadequate, and then blames me.  She is always right.  It took me two decades to create physical distance from myself and not expect her to EVER praise my behavior.  Ever.  Her issue, not mine.

    Over time it might not matter so much why he does it.   You fell as through you ruined the night.  Don't let him. Over time recognize that he does this to himself and it's sad for him, but not you.

  • 2 weeks ago

    So you don't get in bad moods? You are really lucky. But maybe you should try to be more empathetic to the rest of lost souls who do. When you are in a bad mood sometimes there is nothing others can do for you to get your out of your bad mood. Dad isn't making you feel bad, you are doing that to yourself because you can't accept that you have no power to make him happy sometimes.

    • linkus86
      Lv 7
      2 weeks agoReport

      Like you, Dad has bad moods.  When you are in a bad mood do you try to make others feel bad too?  Neither does Dad.  If you feel bad because of his bad moods, that is because you are doing it to yourself, so Dad doesn't deserve your blame.

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  • martin
    Lv 7
    2 weeks ago

    Your dad is trying to dominate your life. Don't let him.

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