Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsWeddings · 4 weeks ago

Excuses to not attend an ex wedding?

So basically, my ex sent me an invitation to his wedding about 3 months ago and I made a mistake of telling him that I will let him know if I’m coming instead of just saying no and that I have plans.

 We are actually really good friends now even though we don’t really keep in contact much. But I don’t want to attend his wedding at all because I don’t feel comfortable being there and I don’t want to make his fiancé feel uncomfortable as well.

What are some excuses I can use without causing any conflicts or drama between us?


Should I just not show up and instead of telling him I’m not coming?

27 Answers

  • 3 days ago

    You Proclaim to be quote-unquote really good friends. I thought that good friends could be honest with each other. What is wrong with quote unquote I don't feel comfortable attending your wedding as a former lover. 

    It is incredibly rude to give the impression you're going to attend and then purposely not show up. You do understand that the bride and groom are paying for your food in advance and if you don't show up they have wasted their money on a meal that will never be eaten.

    Good friends don't do that to each other.

  • Foofa
    Lv 7
    2 weeks ago

    The old, "I'b zo zurry, I hab a bad code" never gets old.

  • Anonymous
    3 weeks ago

    you just tell him you can't make it. doesn't have to have any reason behind it.... and honestly in my opinion is it very weird that your ex invited you to his wedding..

  • 3 weeks ago

    You don't need any excuse - you just RSVP no and leave it at that.

  • How do you think about the answers? You can sign in to vote the answer.
  • Kelly
    Lv 7
    3 weeks ago

    The only notification that you need is your "no" on the rsvp. You're not obligated to give a reason.

  • Anonymous
    4 weeks ago

    Has he been pressuring you...if so he must realize you were not going or if not no big deal send a card congratulating them and call it a day.  Otherwise if you must have an excuse tell him the truth...

  • drip
    Lv 7
    4 weeks ago

    How can just not showing up make this any better?  No you an adult and you tell them sorry I just can’t make it. I wish you all the best.  

    If they sent you an invitation your should of sent it back ASAP with a rsvp of no.  Then sent a wedding card wishing them well. 

  • 4 weeks ago

    You are waaaay overthinking this. Don't forget, he's about to get married!   There is so much going on right now it's likely he hasn't given this a second's thought since your last convo on it.  If you don't show, it's barely a blip on his radar.  Meanwhile, you've been delaying for 3 months.  

    You need to decline the invite, but you do NOT need to give a reason.  Also, why is this something you tell him?  Send the rsvp card back, or respond to the evite, or do whatever they want guests to do.  But do it today.  If he gets curious and asks about it, just tell him you'd feel uncomfortable.  Don't tell him you're worried about his fiancee being uncomfortable.   That doesn't come across the way you think it does/

  • 4 weeks ago

    If y’all are friends, telling him what you told us should be sufficient. Many ex’s would feel uncomfortable at such an event. (Talking from experience)

  • 4 weeks ago

    I'm not sure why it would cause drama and conflict if you didn't attend the wedding. If you aren't comfortable tell him the truth, which is "i'm not comfortable". Why would he feel uncomfortable if you weren't there? Unless you're the bride.

Still have questions? Get your answers by asking now.