My best friend and I would like to go on holiday abroad after the end of this scholastic term. We're both 18, we have already planned the whole holiday in great detail and got part-time jobs to afford it.
Here's the problem: I'm a girl and my parents won't allow me to go on holiday with a boy.
What can I do? We both care a lot about it and don't want to give up.
- NancyLv 78 months agoFavorite Answer
If you're set on it. Then you just do it. You tell your parents that you've got it all planned out in great detail, that you will be careful and know how to be careful because they spent your whole life teaching you how, and that he's not a boy but an 18-year-old man, just like you're an 18-year-old woman. Tell them that that should actually make them feel better about it because you traveling alone or only with another woman your age is the greater risk. And you not traveling at all is the greatest risk of all because its certain to bring a lifetime of regret and resentment over not seizing the moment and fulfilling a lifelong dream at the exact moment in your life when it's most appropriate and when you most can. Tell them that you realize that they're worried about the whole male-female thing, the whole sex thing, but not to be, because they can trust you. If they tell you they trust you but not him, answer that if they really trust you, then they trust your judgement to trust him and not to go off across Europe with some guy who isn't trustworthy. And then grab the sex bull by the horns. Tell them you two could have sex anytime anywhere and don't have to go across Europe to do it, so that's obviously not your reason for going. The vacation isn't to go off and have sex (well, not entirely and not necessarily with him). You say that you want to go with him because you trust him and feel confident that you two can keep each other safe doing something you both have always really wanted to do, something people only really get a chance to do when they're young, when they're 18, and putting it off often means never doing it. Tell them you don't want to have that regret. After you make your case, you tell them that you very much want their blessing but that it's your decision and you're going whether you get it or not. Maybe they'll be mad at you for a while. But maybe not. Maybe by asserting your independence with a sensible argument as to why it's actually beneficial that he go with you, they'll see reason and feel more assured that you're not too young anymore and that you're ready to do this on your own. Whatever the case, by showing that you're doing it not out of spite or rebellion but as an informed decision and showing you're not asking for their permission but just their blessing because you respect them and love them and don't want to do such a huge thing without them being on your side, I think they'll eventually come around. Maybe not right then but later after they've gotten used to the idea and discussed it among themselves, maybe even argued about it, because you really only have to win one of them over, and once you've done that, that one will win the other one over.
- Dr. StephanieLv 77 months ago
You are eighteen, which means you are legally able to make your own decisions, whether or not you are actually mature enough to make wise ones. So, if you're living at home with your parents, you probably would have to face the consequences of going against their wishes, whatever they might be, but they really can't stop you from going. Perhaps you could allay some of their concerns by arranging for others to accompany you, as well? What ARE their concerns? Ask, if you don't know, and maybe, by discussing them, you can alleviate them. You didn't disclose where you plan to go and what you might plan to do, perhaps either or both of these things are of concern to your parents? Good wishes,
- bluebellbkkLv 78 months ago
I'm so sorry to hear that you didn't realise until now that you were a girl and your friend was a boy. I can quite understand the urgency of your question.
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- sunshine_melLv 78 months ago
You're 18 - ie an adult. You can make your own life choices now.
- martinLv 78 months ago
It could lead to love, marriage, the whole 9 yards. Or, as most parents are thinking in the backs of their minds, it could lead to an escapade in which the guy ends up feeling like Romeo and you end up with nothing.
- Anonymous8 months ago
Legally, you're an adult.
They can't really stop you.
You buy the ticket, have your passport... There's nothing they can do?
- Anonymous8 months ago
18 = Adult
go on the trip.....your parents may get PO but you are an adult.
- John DDLv 78 months ago
"We're both 18..."
There's your answer - you are adults and make your own choices.