Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsWeddings · 1 month ago

His mom missed the wedding and passed away during the honeymoon. Any advice?

The week of our wedding, my husband's mom went to the hospital unexpectedly. She proceeded to miss the rehearsal, wedding, and all activities. When we went on our honeymoon, she unexpectedly passed away. Our wedding and honeymoon memories are consumed by hospital visits and funeral planning. (Side note: His dad died 5 years ago). We waited 10 years to get married, and then this happened. I feel like we are cursed. Any advice?

Update:

We both are very saddened by the loss.

9 Answers

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  • 1 month ago
    Best Answer

    I would let this honeymoon be what it is, and just have a re-honeymoon later. If you try and hold this up to some expectation of what it should be, you will be lost. If you just chalk it up to really bad random timing, and spend time reconnecting later, I think you can let go of what this event "should have been." Not a curse, death happens, and never at a convenient time. Just be there for him, and support him as a wife. Marriages have times where there is stress, and the bond between you can serve as a bridge. It sucks that has to be now, but that is life. Now is the time for emotional support, and later you guys can go have fun.

  • Anonymous
    4 weeks ago

    oh wow that... is very unfortunate.

  • Ocimom
    Lv 7
    4 weeks ago

    Am sorry for the unexpected loss of your MIL. We never know what day will be our last. You are NOT under a curse of any kind. But I do suggest you both go to family grief counseling to help you go thru this period.

  • Linda
    Lv 5
    4 weeks ago

    Be there for your husband and comfort him. I am sorry for your husband's loss.

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  • g
    Lv 7
    4 weeks ago

    My advice: Grieve. Mourn. Support one another through the process, and continue to live your lives. I'm not buying the "cursed" idea - death is indeed a part of life and will always be.

  • Kelly
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    If my mom, MIL, FIL or any of our siblings were gravely ill, I wouldn't have gone on my honeymoon. I would have even skipped it if it was my ex-husband, knowing my kids would have needed me then.

    I can go on vacation anytime (that's all a honeymoon is), those important people will only have their final moments once. I wouldn't care about the lost money.

    My dad died years ago, I was there with him when he died. One of my brothers was at home with his wife and newborn baby and my other brother was at work. We knew he was dying and their biggest regret was not being there in his final moments. That's not a feeling I'd want my husband to have.

    How is your honeymoon consumed with hospital visits if you weren't there?

  • drip
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Life happens.

    I think I would of tried to postpone the honeymoon if she was in the hospital.

    But this isn’t being cursed.

    • drip
      Lv 7
      1 month agoReport

      Yes sometimes you can’t cancel.
      So in the future, try to take a second honeymoon that can be just for the two of you

  • 1 month ago

    If you think you’re cursed, imagine how your dead mother-in-law must feel.

  • 1 month ago

    ...this is really not about you.

    You seem to be taking her lack of attendance as a personal affront rather than an unavoidable tragedy

    • BeatriceBatten
      Lv 7
      1 month agoReport

      What exactly is your question? You’re already in therapy, which is basically all you can do at this point. There’s nothing we can tell you here that a therapist won’t also tell you. Have you also had a depression screening at your doctor’s office?

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