Am I the Asshole?

Three months ago I got a new job. Everything is awesome love working there. Made new friends. One friend in particular her name is Shay. She is 4 years younger than me and just so happens to be going through a tough time. her mom was milking her dry with rent costing 600 a month for just a bedroom and her mom was constantly asking for extra money. So she ended up finding a place of her own and moved out. I let her stay with me until she found a place. I have fed her countless times. When I leave work she will beg me to go get her something to eat and say she will pay back. Which granted she did the first few times. All this is ok. But as soon as she moved out i told her I needed a break. I didnt tell her my true feelings which is I feel like we've only known eachother for a few months and shes constantly asking me for help. Sooo today I got off at 1 pm and was stoked to be able to get some things done. But then... I go to the break room and shes sitting there all puffy eyed and in her pajamas and asked if I could give her a ride to this mechanic who is working on her car then to her place. I said ok, but I needed to go to target first. So we go to target she said she forgot her purse at work. Go back to work, she gets her purse. Go to the mechanic then on her way to her house shes looking through her stuff. She looks at me and asks if we can just go to my house. I said what for? She said she forgot her house keys at work. I was sooooo done. But didn't show it.

46 Answers

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  • Lita
    Lv 6
    2 months ago

    To use reddit terms since this reads like it should be on the Am I The Asshole subreddit: NTA. You are not the asshole. She's the one in the wrong for using you. If you're guilty of anything here it's having a good heart and being taken shameless advantage of her by her.

  • 2 months ago

    No. This girl is MILKING you.

    I suggest you back off the relationship and try to keep it about work. I don’t think her mom is milking her, I suspect she is some sort of narcissist working her claws into you.

    Be busy. Don’t be afraid to say “No, I can’t do that.” Or just “No, thanks.”

    You don’t need to explain or justify, just “no”.

    Frank is right, the word is USER.

  • 2 months ago

    If you have to ask the question then maybe

  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

    Just reading that was exhausting. She must be really hot or something.

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  • 2 months ago

    she sounds very irresponsible and aint' nobody got time for that.

  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

    You will be killed off

  • 2 months ago

    sounds like she's taking advantage of your kind heart*....Time for her to have a reality check...meaning...don't always be her knight n shinning armour..the one who is always there to pickup her pieces when she's in shambles*....she sounds very irresponsible and is acting the same way towards you as her mum did with her...from now on let her know ...Sorry you're busy*....sorry you don't have any money she can borrow...tell her everytime she has some drama story...that you're not able to help as ur busy*...she'll get the mssg* or just come straight out n tell her the next time she's wanting more n more from you..that you are NOT in a position to be doing this all the time to HELP HER OUT*...ur on a budget n need to stick with it..u have bills also*.........and just STOP doing stuff for her everytime she sheds a tear*..she KNOWS you'll cave in and give her whatever it is she's needing at the time*..Enough is Enough Now*..be firm but make sure she gets the point/mssg that YOU ARE NOT AND WILL NOT BE THE ONE TO ALWAYS BAIL HER OUT OF HER TROUBLES*....but NO ...YOU are NOT the asshole*

  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

    Nope! Your not an As*hole but unless you're at least getting a little Sex out of it once in a while your definitely getting played for a Sucker!

  • 2 months ago

    You are not, it isn't your responsibility to run her life, let her figure these things out on her own.

    You don't owe her anything, you have done enough.

  • Frank
    Lv 5
    2 months ago

    Nope. She is a USER just like her mommy. Stop the madness and just make a list of excuses why you can’t help her any more. She is not your friend. You owe her nothing.

    • M.
      Lv 7
      2 months agoReport

      Don't make excuses.

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