Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 2 months ago

Is it normal my 21 year old son comes home late all ths time?

I'm currently having problems with my 21 year old son coming home late everyday. He comes home anytime between 8 30pm - 10pm when he's been out with friends, or has been travelling. A lot of close people are saying this behaviour isn't normal and that i should take a stance against this. They are asking what on earth he's doing out for more than 12 hours each day. I too wonder this and think it's not normal. I feel my son is taking the mickey and being disrespectful by doing this.

I am finding it difficult to enforce a rule or curfew as my son will just rebel. We are having problems with him lying to us. He claims it's so he can have freedom, but some people think he does it to hurt us.

What do you guys think of what I've just said?

27 Answers

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  • 2 months ago

    Pretty normal. He's grown and can make his own time table and come and go at will.

  • GEEGEE
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    The time frame you mention is hardly "late" for a 21 year, by any stretch of the imagination. It is not excessive and it's not extreme. He could be socializing with friends, going to the gym, all kinds of things. Not sure what he's lying about but it may be to avoid your dramatic response to his "lateness".

  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

    Yeah, it's very normal. He's an ADULT NOW, not a little boy. If you don't like his hours, then you should tell him to move out and get his own place. Then you won't have to worry about what kind of hours he keeps.

  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

    Youre complaining about a 21 year old adult coming in at 10pm?

    Are you serious?

    He sounds really respectful, you sound like a nutcase.

    Your son is normal, you are abnormal.

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  • 2 months ago

    Did you 21 or 12 year old son? If he is 12 then you have a problem if he is 21 than he is an adult who is legally allowed to do as he wants with in the law. If it is worrying you that he is out and you're worried for his safety then maybe just ask him to text you to let you know he is safe. Otherwise grow up I am pretty sure at that age you were out late actually no wait 10pm for a 21 year old is not late...

  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

    Your question sounds crazy, but I'll answer.

    Your son is an adult whether he acts that way or not. If he is still a student, it is understandable for him to live at home. If him coming in that late (that really isn't very late at all!) disturbs your sleep, tell him that and try to work it out with him. Otherwise, it may be none of your business. However, if he is not still in school and living with you, set a deadline a few months from now for him to move out and live on his own. It is apparent his life style and your life style do not match.

    Now, about your friends. Stop listening to them and refuse to discuss it with them any more. They are destroying what remains of your relationship with your son.

  • 2 months ago

    your 21 yr old son comes home 8-10pm n you're wondering what he's doing?? Well im sure he's working thru the day hours then unwinds with friends for a bite to eat n chat..then he comes home*.....as for the PPL in ur life telling you he's doing it to HURT YOU???? HOW IS THAT?? why would these ppl even suggest that to you?? that's crazy ¬!!!!!!......... n THEY ARE Wondering WHAT YOUR SON is doing for 12hrs that he's out of the house? WHO R THESE PPL to be studying your son n his habits in his life?? HE IS AN ADULT!...he is home by 10pm!!! he's not being irresponsible or disrespectful at all* he's not strolling in ur house at 3am or 5am* waking the house up!....STOP LISTENING TO THESE PPL That are filling your head with all kinds of silliness* Tell them to WATCH their own children n figure out what they're up to instead of being all up in your face about ur son who so far from what you've said hasn't done anything wrong in my eyes* it's NORMAL for a young adult man to be out with his mates for a few hours* Like i said he's not strolling in at 4am!!!! Sit down with ur son....who by the way is an ADULT so treat him as such*¬.............. u can ask what it is he does all those hours...............but remember...he IS AN ADULT N HE IS HOME BY 10pm which is pretty EARLY if u think about it..............im sure if u talked with other parents who have 21 yr old kids...they stroll in god awful hours and they ARE disprespectful in how they speak with their parents n waking the house up with such wee hours n coming in drunk n loud*..YOUR SON probably works or is in schoool ALL DAY...n goes for a bite to eat n chat with some friends and is home by 10!pm...........BE THANKFUL!..........and STOP listening to these busy bodies ppl who are trying to control how you parent a 21 yr old*............................... BE THANKFUL your son is RESPECTFUL of a curfew so he's not disrupting the house ................geeze*.............STOP LISTENING TO UR SO CALLED FRIENDS as they're filling your head with garbage*¬!

  • 2 months ago

    He’s a grown *** man if he wants to stay out late as long as he’s not breaking the law why do you care

  • 2 months ago

    I have a 21 year old about to turn 22, he stays out late and sometimes all weekend with friends and girlfriends, etc, It is 1000% normal, he is a young man enjoying life, just make sure he knows not to be out taking drugs, partying and drinking and driving, I have always told mine if he is out drinking, make sure he has a place to stay where he is or call me to come get him, remember, we were young once too, we loved life, we hung out, stay gone, etc, I did anyways, but it is absolutely normal, don't sweat it, mine comes in at 3 and 4 am sometimes

  • paul
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    10 pm ??????, lmfao lmfao you should be happy it is that early

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