Is a $20 birthday gift from your brother really cheap? (We're both adults)?
So every year I spend about $90-$120 on a birthday gift for my brother. I make about $20 an hour. I think of it as 4-6 hours worth of work is the value of the gift. If I work a short 8hr shift I make $160. He makes about $18 an hour but has more money than me. He knows I spend that much (which I feel is reasonable) it's 0.3 percent of my annual income. His is 0.05 percent which is 1.1hrs of work for him. So once a year he thinks his brother's birthday is worth 1.1hrs of work. I know that he is frugal, and sometimes even cheap so I thought because I spent $120 dollars most recently that he would probably spend $80 (2/3rds) of what I spent. But you know I figure for his income that $50 would be the bare minimum. When I found out it was $20! I was very offended. I am convinced that he is actually a bad person. He constantly blows me off when I make time in my busy schedule to see him, Hes always rude to me and ignores what I say because his phone is more important. He is beyond selfish. Im his brother for God sake. "Its the thought that counts!" He doesnt even put any thought into it either! Its so predictable what he got, its not unique, its not special, its lame. I am embarrassed that I was "generous"... Generous would be $300 (15hrs) So obviously I'm gonna get him like a $25 giftcard to Mcdonalds next year (but that would still be more generous)
- audreyLv 76 months agoFavorite Answer
So don't spend so much on him next time.
- Orla CLv 76 months ago
Grow up. It's the thought that counts.
- Anonymous6 months ago
We gave up buying gifts for each other years ago.
- PearlLv 76 months ago
kind of but he didnt have to give you anything at all
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- 6 months ago
You sound like the selfish one! No one is obligated to get you a present and at least he gets you something. You don't have to spend as much as you do on him and obviously you're only doing it to get something in return so it's not like you're thinking of him. It's just weird that you added all that up and expect him to spend that much.
- TjLv 76 months ago
Time to stop gifts. You are both adults...A card is appropriate.....talk to him, tell him its time to stop the gifting
- linkus86Lv 76 months ago
No. It's an effort to celebrate your birthday. How much is spent isn't the point, nor is the gift. What is important is that the giver is doing so to celebrate you because you matter to them. Offering him a bigger gift doesn't mean you celebrate him more or that he matters more to you than you to him because love, friendship and family are not competitive sports where a score is kept. And when you do, you harm the relationship.
- MurzyLv 76 months ago
Be glad that he remembers your bday and gets you a gift.
- MarkLv 76 months ago
Let me guess: you also think that B-S about "your fiance doesn't love you unless he spends a year's worth of salary and sells a kidney for a wedding ring" stuff.
- NancyLv 66 months ago
No, it's not. It's normal. Your $90 to $120 birthday presents are what's not normal. They're over-the-top. He doesn't even want to get those gifts from you, hence the $20 gift, meaning he clearly wants his next birthday gift to be reasonably priced. He's not sending a message that he's cheap. He's sending a message that you are going overboard and he wants it to stop.
- dewcoonsLv 76 months ago
Really. You are upset over a few dollars for a birthday gift? Is that really the most important thing in life? Does it really affect your whole relationship with your brother? Really?
If it bothers you that much then next birthday go with a $20 gift. Then it is no longer an issue.