Anonymous asked in HealthMental Health · 1 year ago

Adult daughter cut me out of her life. Do you think I deserve it?

My adult daughter has completely cut me out of her life, and I just don't know what to do anymore. She is 34 years old, and I am 62. We have always had a really close relationship, up until about 3 years ago. We had a massive falling out over her husband.

One of her former friends told me that her husband cheated on her with some random woman, and I told everyone else about it - but they all kept it a secret. After I told everyone, her friend told me it was all lies and she wanted to get back at my daughter for spreading lies about her sister in the past. My daughter eventually found out, and scolded me for it. She said that she will never forgive me for spreading lies about her husband, and that she doesn't want to see me again.

I've tried talking to her ever since, but she just won't. When there's a family get-together, either I'm left out, or my daughter leaves if she sees me there.

Do you think I deserve to have my daughter cut me out of her life?


Why does this question keep on getting moved to the "Abuse and Spam" section?

Update 2:

Is what I did unforgivable? Am I the best mother to ever exist?

24 Answers

  • 1 year ago
    Favorite Answer

    I think her response was quite overdramatic and disproportionate. You were genuinely trying to help your daughter and had no malicious intent. Her anger should be directed at her friend for starting the rumor, not you for spreading it.

    I suggest you sit down and have a conversation with her. You have a right to get your side of the story across.

  • 1 year ago

    you don't deserve it. it was a misunderstanding. you as her mother were just watching out for her. but this information that you received from her friends should not have been spread around. you should have talked to her first to find out if it was true. why would you even believe her friends? at the end of the day it was just a misunderstanding by a rumor and lie. and you're her mother. that's unfair

  • 1 year ago

    Yes! What mother does that? common you need to genuinely apologise to her. What you did was unfair and interfering in the private life of your daughter. She is your daughter, yes and agreed but please show some respect!

  • Ann
    Lv 7
    1 year ago

    The fact that you told "everyone else" was a deal breaker for your daughter. She was humiliated, and by the one person who should have been mature enough to keep her mouth shut (you). You should have gone to her, not "everyone else". No doubt this has ruined her relationships with the people you so blatantly confided in (which was none of your business in the first place), and she is embarrassed to face them. Shame on you as a parent. She will likely never trust you again.

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  • 1 year ago

    She will be back. Just go live your life and enjoy it. You are her mother and the more you beg her the more she feels she has the upper hand. If your intentions were pure, then let it go. Even if you already said you are sorry and she doesnt want to talk to you anymore over her husband, then let her live her life. Have faith in your positions. I mean what's life without mom, right?

  • 1 year ago

    No you don’t deserve that

  • 1 year ago

    you don’t deserve it. my dad actually went through the same thing with his daughter. she’s 36 now and he’s 57 but my dad and her boyfriend got in an argument and now she won’t talk to him . sorry bout ur situation

  • GB
    Lv 5
    1 year ago

    If you told everyone about, why do you think they would keep it secret?

  • Anonymous
    1 year ago

    It sounds like it to me. Her relationship with her husband is none of your business let alone everyone that you told. I don't blame her in the least for reacting the way she has. Stop acting like you think you are the victim here. You are the victimizer!

  • Anonymous
    1 year ago

    "I told everyone else about it" - Just what a loving mother with a fantastic relationship with her daughter would do; tell everyone she knew her son-in-law cheated.

    You deserve whatever you get.

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