Bra size (people with boobs only please no trolling im in pain)?

I currently wear a 36 g. I’m a 190lbs 5’8” girl and my waist is 35 inches around somehow. Every time I buy a bra, it seems to gap near where the top meets the strap, but somehow spill over the center and sides. The strap rides up my back on the tightest clip. The straps dig into my shoulder and I have... show more I currently wear a 36 g. I’m a 190lbs 5’8” girl and my waist is 35 inches around somehow. Every time I buy a bra, it seems to gap near where the top meets the strap, but somehow spill over the center and sides. The strap rides up my back on the tightest clip. The straps dig into my shoulder and I have semi-permanent dents in them. What do I do? I’m afraid to size up because of more gapping and can’t size down because of spillage. I feel like if I go down a band size to 34 then my back will be squeezed and look horrible even with time. My back and shoulders are in constant pain and I crack every time I move. Any advice on finding the right size?
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