How do I get my father to start exercising and taking care of himself?

I have a question that I am hoping someone may be able to assist me with as I have tried all that I can think of with no luck. Now the situation that is occurring is not necessarily a problem with myself rather than with my father. Back in 2004 I had my father come to stay with me as his health started to fail... show more I have a question that I am hoping someone may be able to assist me with as I have tried all that I can think of with no luck. Now the situation that is occurring is not necessarily a problem with myself rather than with my father. Back in 2004 I had my father come to stay with me as his health started to fail him. Anyways, what had happened is that he was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes which tends to run on my fathers side of the family. So since he was not able to get around well and since he started to lose his sight, had to leave his job and go on disability, I decided to step up and have him come stay with me while he got back into better health. Anyways, that was back in 2004, when he was 50 years old. It is now coming up on 2011 and he is almost 57 years old. He has been getting worse all along, went from 250 lbs up to about 450 lbs in that time. I can not get him to step away from his computer as he seems to think he needs to be on facebook all of the time. He has his computer in his bedroom, about 2 steps to the right of his desk is his bed and about 2 steps to his left is his tv and dresser. The only time I can get him to leave his room is to come get his food and he goes directly back to his computer and eats there. He is to the point that he retains so much water that he is on 2 diuretics and his sores on his legs do not heal well. I have tried to convince him to exercise however he claims he can't. I have gotten an exercise bike for him to use, he claims he can't climb on it, I got a treadmill, he won't even try it at minimum speed, I bought a cable weight set that he wouldn't touch, bought a pedal set that he can use at his desk, he has never touched it, and bought myself a freeweight set that he won't touch. He always expects me to run all of the errands. I have tried many times to hint that he needs to get into shape, but he refuses. always claiming he hurts to much or that he can't move around enough. It has gotten very pathetic as he buys a computer chair and they never last more than a couple of months. The height adjusters almost always go out immediately due to his weight.

Anyways, over the past couple of years my health has taken a turn for the worse too due to a recurrence in my epilepsy, I am no longer able to drive and do all of my errands on a bicycle now or I walk. I constantly work out myself lifting weights or bicycling and keep my weight at or below 200 and I am 2 inches taller than my father.

I have pretty much lost hope in getting my father to try to get a little into shape and I would like to have my own life however it seems that I am stuck with him. When I have ever said anything about moving out on my own to have a family of my own since I am 30 years old and the only one of my siblings to not be married, he pulls a guilt trip on me asking what I plan to about him then. I have given up my entire life for 6 years now and I think that it is time for me. i can't get any of my 3 siblings to step up and help either. Anyways I think this has gotten very pathetic and other than making him go to a nursing home I have no other idea what to do as I seem to be stuck with all of the decision making and so he is going to hate me for it. If I ever try to talk with him about money, about getting into shape, or about getting his will and assets in line he gets very angry and starts yelling at me saying he doesn't want to discuss it. Even though my parents are divorced due to my fathers laziness everything is still willed to my mother who is now remarried.

I am just hoping that someone may have some suggestions on what to do to help resolve this situation as just trying to deal with him has caused so much stress that my epileptologist says it is a major factor in my seizures and depression issues and that I need to get away from it all permanently. I just have no clue what to do as I know we can't afford to put him in a home and I know it would kill him anyways losing all of his assets and being stuck in a home, but he is just so lazy and not willing to watch his diet or exercise. The other part that bothers me is having to clean up after him, he won't wipe up his messes in the kitchen and due to his poor diet he gets the runs very bad and never cleans it up so I have to.

Any suggestions by anyone would be greatly appreciated, thank you.
Update: Some additional information that may also be helpful is that I still have the exercise bike, the treadmill and the weights at home. I have even tried to get him to join the fitness center as they have a hot tub a heated therapy pool and a regular pool, along with masseuses, fitness instructors and a huge amount of... show more Some additional information that may also be helpful is that I still have the exercise bike, the treadmill and the weights at home. I have even tried to get him to join the fitness center as they have a hot tub a heated therapy pool and a regular pool, along with masseuses, fitness instructors and a huge amount of weight sets, both free weights and cable systems that are much lower impact.

He has not been willing to check into any of this, whenever I am actually able to get him to leave the house for a bit he always has to go home very quickly, conveniently forgetting to take his insulin or something. The truth about that is that he wants to get home to get on facebook as I have gone home with him many times at the same time and he never takes any insulin. He just gets on facebook. The doctors have tried giving him anti depressants, lexapro, which he never takes. He says he only takes it when he feels depressed. I try to explain to him that with SSRI meds like that you have to s
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