• Should I tell my girlfriend that I have a daughter?

    I had a daughter with a woman I met when I was studying in Germany. She's 5 and she lives with her mother. I visit her a couple of times every year. I haven't told my girlfriend because the girl lives far away and she will probably never meet her. Besides, I want to open a new chapter in my life. The past... show more
    I had a daughter with a woman I met when I was studying in Germany. She's 5 and she lives with her mother. I visit her a couple of times every year. I haven't told my girlfriend because the girl lives far away and she will probably never meet her. Besides, I want to open a new chapter in my life. The past is the past.
    26 answers · 22 hours ago
  • My Grandpa is rude and selfish, is it normal for people his age and health condition to act him or how should we deal with him?

    I understand he can't drive anymore because he's 73 with health problems and needs his medications and my Dad lets him live with us. But he still is rude and sometimes selfish like he tells us to get him stuff and take him to the store, the doctor or to get him stuff even when he sees we are busy working... show more
    I understand he can't drive anymore because he's 73 with health problems and needs his medications and my Dad lets him live with us. But he still is rude and sometimes selfish like he tells us to get him stuff and take him to the store, the doctor or to get him stuff even when he sees we are busy working and homework when my brother and I take him he's generally rude to the courtesy clerks and waitresses. He tells my mom to make him breakfast when she's busy cleaning the House and never says thank you and tells his friends at the Senior Center that my mom and dad don't do anything for him. The one thing that set me off about him is one time I told him that my dad was in the hospital and all he said was "when you come back, get me a Coke." Then I'm like Can't he think about anyone other than himself. Someone's in the hospital and all he thinks about is wanting his Coke.
    6 answers · 16 hours ago
  • My grandma PASSED AWAY?

    Best answer: And this is the venue you come to seek sympathy from?
    Best answer: And this is the venue you come to seek sympathy from?
    16 answers · 21 hours ago
  • Should I move to Texas with my sister and her boyfriend?

    I currently am 13 and live in a toxic household. CPS has been called on my parents multiple times but nothing has happened because they didn’t have enough evidence. My mom stole drugs from her mother and gets drunk all the time, my father drinks and screams at us. My sister got kicked out and is living with my moms... show more
    I currently am 13 and live in a toxic household. CPS has been called on my parents multiple times but nothing has happened because they didn’t have enough evidence. My mom stole drugs from her mother and gets drunk all the time, my father drinks and screams at us. My sister got kicked out and is living with my moms mom. She will be moving to Texas with her boyfriend after she graduates this coming year. Thy offered me to live with them but all my friends live up here in Oregon, but I don’t want to live with my parents. They scream and yell at me for no reason. This whole situation has caused me to feel suicidal and depressed. Thank you!
    19 answers · 2 days ago
  • What'd you think of a woman who QUITS her high- paying job after having babies?

    And by high-paying, i mean higher paying than her husband (who also earns well but less than her). And no, not even maternity leave-- she quits work forever... (You DO know that such jobs need loads of dedication/struggle in your University years) What'd you think of this woman? (This woman's my sister)
    And by high-paying, i mean higher paying than her husband (who also earns well but less than her). And no, not even maternity leave-- she quits work forever... (You DO know that such jobs need loads of dedication/struggle in your University years) What'd you think of this woman? (This woman's my sister)
    45 answers · 4 days ago
  • Mom trying to make me co-sign her loan.?

    My mom has horrible credit at less than 500. She is trying to make me co-sign a car loan so that she can get a car. My fiance and I live with her yes but we pull our own weight and more. We buy groceries, pet food (including feeding her pets + ours), buy household materials, and I have helped her more than once to... show more
    My mom has horrible credit at less than 500. She is trying to make me co-sign a car loan so that she can get a car. My fiance and I live with her yes but we pull our own weight and more. We buy groceries, pet food (including feeding her pets + ours), buy household materials, and I have helped her more than once to pay her car insurance, loan her money, buy her medicine, etc. My fiance works Full Time and pays her rent ($150/month) + pays the cable she wants+ buys groceries+ loans her money. I feel like she just expects me to do this as we live with her. I do not want to ruin the credit that I have worked hard to build (I pay all my bills on time and spend responsibly). My credit is a 679/ 687 (something like that). She is guilt tripping me because I won't do it! Yet she has never been responsible and had a car repossessed. What do I do?
    85 answers · 6 days ago
  • My father died and did not leave a will?

    Best answer: If he died intestate (without a will) the estate will have to go through probate and that's where these decisions will be made.
    Best answer: If he died intestate (without a will) the estate will have to go through probate and that's where these decisions will be made.
    12 answers · 1 day ago
  • Leave my live in Bf or stay and figure it out?

    Ok so all he does is smoke and drink. He comes home and drinks at least 5 beers a night. Then on the weekends he gets drunk. All we do is hangout with his parents either at their house or they come with us to his friends houses. they are more like his friends then parents and I can't take it. He spends all his... show more
    Ok so all he does is smoke and drink. He comes home and drinks at least 5 beers a night. Then on the weekends he gets drunk. All we do is hangout with his parents either at their house or they come with us to his friends houses. they are more like his friends then parents and I can't take it. He spends all his money on beer and cigarettes and we never do anything I want to do. He always gets defensive when I try to talk to him about how much he drinks and how much his family drinks. I am not kidding they have events where its just a huge drunk fest all weekend and they call it a family vacation. every event is to do with drinking beer. We also don't ever talk about anything. I feel like i'm going to exploded and i'm only 21 years old. I don't know what to do but it feels good to tell someone how I feel. I cant keep it in any longer. Also I live an hour from my family and we are only 16 mins from his family. He doesn't want to live closer to my family even though I asked if we could just be a little closer. I have a 40 min drive to collage so he can have a shorter drive to work (20 mins). I wanted to go to the beach this weekend and he told me that it sounded really boring and he wouldn't go. Instead he said we could hangout at his parents house where I would just sit there bored while his parents and him drink and smoke till 2 am and its awful. I think I know what to do but its so hard since we live together I don't know how to tell him that I am so unhappy.
    21 answers · 3 days ago
  • Is it okay for parents to leave bruises?

    I got beat by my mom because my mom was beating one of my twin sisters for something she did and my other twin sister said it was actually her that did it. I told my mum it was actually her and then she started denying it then I got a bit annoyed and said “why would you lie about that tho?” Then my mum beat me with... show more
    I got beat by my mom because my mom was beating one of my twin sisters for something she did and my other twin sister said it was actually her that did it. I told my mum it was actually her and then she started denying it then I got a bit annoyed and said “why would you lie about that tho?” Then my mum beat me with a stick because she said I shouldn’t get involved and I tried to explain what I meant but she just kept on beating me and left bruises all over my arm and leg. Is that fine?
    10 answers · 20 hours ago
  • How can I still be a father/Dad after she left me and took my son?

    I'm just empty. All I ever did was try. Never harmed her or him. But she met another man. I came home from work and my home was emptied and my family gone. I have no idea what to do. Fml..... I just want my family back. I just want my little guy back. I've never felt pain like this. I thought I loved hard... show more
    I'm just empty. All I ever did was try. Never harmed her or him. But she met another man. I came home from work and my home was emptied and my family gone. I have no idea what to do. Fml..... I just want my family back. I just want my little guy back. I've never felt pain like this. I thought I loved hard enough and worked and provided. I don't know where to turn. Or who to ask or how to get help. It hurts. It burns. Nobody is perfect but I always provided. I always loved and I always put her and my son first. I don't know how she could do this to me but now I can't even see the light of hope. Just 3 days ago my 2 yr old son was jumping for joy when I came home from work. Now my home is empty, cold, silent and dark just as I can feel my heart turning the same. Somebody please ******* help..... I just want my boy back home. But I'm not even sure if that is possible or doable....
    8 answers · 18 hours ago
  • Dad is an alcoholic and won't get help. How do I stop feeling others blame me for it?

    Best answer: "I feel I am at fault cause when people see him drunk they think of me, his son" I can tell you exactly what is happening here, because I'm a substance abuse counselor and I've seen it many times. Deep down, it's YOU who feels you're at fault somehow. Maybe Dad blamed you for his... show more
    Best answer: "I feel I am at fault cause when people see him drunk they think of me, his son"

    I can tell you exactly what is happening here, because I'm a substance abuse counselor and I've seen it many times. Deep down, it's YOU who feels you're at fault somehow. Maybe Dad blamed you for his drinking once. Maybe you did some typical teen stupid stuff and you're worried this made Dad worse.

    Obviously, none of this is true, but the point is, you're taking these feelings and projecting them on to others (shrinks call this "projection"). It's a normal response, but it's completely untrue. People are aware of his problem, and I can guarantee they aren't thinking of you at all. It's not even logical that a child is responsible for a parent's alcoholism!

    Keep telling yourself this. Also, I understand the knee jerk reaction to protect him or downplay it, but you want to start getting out of that habit. You say it makes things worse, and this is true, but not in the way you meant it. It makes things worse for YOU.
    7 answers · 7 hours ago
  • My family is forcing me to marry my brother’s widow?

    My older brother died 6 months ago in a car crash. He left a wife and two children. My parents are asking me to marry my brother wife so that the children are not rised by a stranger. I said no. They’re urging me to consider it. Is there a way I could raise my brothers kid without marrying his wife?
    My older brother died 6 months ago in a car crash. He left a wife and two children. My parents are asking me to marry my brother wife so that the children are not rised by a stranger. I said no. They’re urging me to consider it. Is there a way I could raise my brothers kid without marrying his wife?
    24 answers · 4 days ago
  • Is it weird for a 20 year old to hold hands and sleep with their mom at night (read description first pls)?

    Best answer: I understand why you want to keep her close and have that love and affection you've missed out so much on at a key stage in your growing up It was tough being a teenager and not having her there for you.You know that you've ended up a bit stuck in your childhood because of this, and part of you would like... show more
    Best answer: I understand why you want to keep her close and have that love and affection you've missed out so much on at a key stage in your growing up It was tough being a teenager and not having her there for you.You know that you've ended up a bit stuck in your childhood because of this, and part of you would like to feel safe in being able to be a more independent adult.
    I wonder what other support/family you had in your life back then, and now?
    I guess you can look at your life in the bigger picture- are you satisfied that you're growing in other areas of your life, such as career, education, relationships? If you see that this may be holding you back, then counselling would really help you to understand what's going on and find ways to come to terms with the perhaps feelings of having been abandoned, feeling unsafe in the world.
    Don't allow others to shame or put you down for your feelings, or share their own weird sexual ideas about this. Just think about how your pain may be holding you back, get help and advice, achieve your own ambitions as an adult- and carry on being close with your mom!
    26 answers · 4 days ago
  • If a 40 year old man dates an immature 21 year old girl who looks 13-14 is he a closet pedophile?

    She is incredibly immature. She cannot spell to save her life and she is from the suburbs, lives in her parents nice home yet she talks in slang terms. Her grammar is awful and she talks like she is in a gang despite living in an affluent neigborhood with her 2 married parents who dote on her. She complains that... show more
    She is incredibly immature. She cannot spell to save her life and she is from the suburbs, lives in her parents nice home yet she talks in slang terms. Her grammar is awful and she talks like she is in a gang despite living in an affluent neigborhood with her 2 married parents who dote on her. She complains that life is too hard and she shouldn't have to do her own laundry or work part time while in college. She is obsessed with memes and facebook and writing long rants about how life is so unfair and she has the hardest life of anyone she knows. The girl is spoiled rotten, her parents baby her and gave her a car, free rent, free college. All she has to do is pay for her car insurance and her food and she thinks its the end of the world. She looks like she is 14 years old at the very oldest. She listens to trap music and the horrible artists that do nothing but swear and say words that rhyme and she is the type that makes snapchat vidoes of her making duckfaces with those songs playing in background. A typical phrase for her is something like "im so sick of life lol, when ur parents tell you have to pay insurance, now wonder people drink or commit suicide, i work just to hand my money to bills, thank god for weed and beer, ugggh" To reiterate she looks 14, she could pass for an 8th grader, she's 4'11 and wears childish clothes as well
    6 answers · 48 mins ago
  • What should I do about this?

    Me and my husband got invited to a friend's party/dinner. We are obviously adults. And they had champagne bottles for the grown ups. I also brought my daughter with me, she's 15. There were other kids there, but they were younger than 10. And my daughter wanted to try one glass of champagne to see what it... show more
    Me and my husband got invited to a friend's party/dinner. We are obviously adults. And they had champagne bottles for the grown ups. I also brought my daughter with me, she's 15. There were other kids there, but they were younger than 10. And my daughter wanted to try one glass of champagne to see what it tasted like. But I didn't let her have any alcohol. Anyways there were leftover bottles at the end and my friend let me take one home. But the next day me and my husband had to work, leaving our daughter home alone. She's also an only child. Anyways when I got home I noticed she drank almost half the bottle by herself. She didn't appear to be drunk or anything, and she's usually a good kid too. Should I punish her for doing this or just leave things how they are?
    11 answers · 2 days ago
  • I told my family about the men who molested me and they’re acting like it’s no big deal and are saying it’s too late. All I need is comfort.?

    I was molested by my older cousin when I was 4. Then I was molested by my grandma’s husband from 5-7 and then by my uncle when I was 11. I blocked out my grandmothers husband and cousin but when it happened again when I was 11 I was so shocked and the memories came back. I am now 18 and have finally told my... show more
    I was molested by my older cousin when I was 4. Then I was molested by my grandma’s husband from 5-7 and then by my uncle when I was 11. I blocked out my grandmothers husband and cousin but when it happened again when I was 11 I was so shocked and the memories came back. I am now 18 and have finally told my parents. My mom said I let them and that I could’ve fought back. My dad said it is now too late and he is trying to convince me that my uncle (his brother) did nothing. My grandma doesn’t believe and I really thought this would make me feel better and I would receive at least a little justice but it’s all gotten worse. I’m so mad and hurt. My mother was molested when she was younger so I’m trying to not be upset with her because that’s how she had to handle it. But I feel like they could at least care a little bit more. I feel like I’m going through the abuse all over again and there are no consequences for the men who abused me. I feel so weak and useless.
    9 answers · 1 day ago
  • Is it me!?

    me and my sis have never gotten along. Theres only 3 years between us. When she became 15 she began smoking weed, stay out late at every party, and invite boys over every other night. because I was 18, and my mum was in full time work I had to look after her and the house. Once one of my friends was having a party... show more
    me and my sis have never gotten along. Theres only 3 years between us. When she became 15 she began smoking weed, stay out late at every party, and invite boys over every other night. because I was 18, and my mum was in full time work I had to look after her and the house. Once one of my friends was having a party and I asked if I could join she said “ your too busy cleaning, anyway nobody likes you” with that she left and didn’t come back till 4am my mum had heard this but didn’t do anything and said that maybe it’s just teenage. When i met my partner at 21, I brought him back home on the first night, we stayed up drinking and laughing together, I thought they’d be glad I met someone but I was called a **** by my sister. Once she told my boyf i was evil and that I’d ruined her life and how he should dump me, he was in absolute awe and didn’t trust her after that. Then one day my mum, sister were unaware that me and my boyf could hear what they were saying about me (that people hate me, I’m insane ) Me and my boyf confronted them but my mum had gotten so drunk she was just staring into space in the end I left . I now live happily with my partner and his family. Yesterday I thought I needed to text my mum and ask why my sis hates me. It didn’t take long for my mum to get upset and my sis 2 text back that I’ve ruined my mums life and should stay away because I’m crazy. My boyf and housemates say I should move on, but I’m heartbroken what do I do?
    7 answers · 6 hours ago
  • Mum s fiancé saying inappropriate things to me.?

    This has been going on for probably two years. We have normal conversations on messenger as I live abroad currently, and nothing has ever happened in real life - but sometimes REALLY inappropriate things are said and questions are asked often of sexual nature. I just ignore it and don t reply... but feel disgusted... show more
    This has been going on for probably two years. We have normal conversations on messenger as I live abroad currently, and nothing has ever happened in real life - but sometimes REALLY inappropriate things are said and questions are asked often of sexual nature. I just ignore it and don t reply... but feel disgusted and almost a bit paralyzed. I have never mentioned this to anyone nor told him off as I don t really know what to do. She s been with him since I was about 11, I m 22 now - so naturally we are quite close since I lived at home until I was 19. However I don t know what to do anymore. This isn t normal things to say and I m a bit torn. I wouldn’t even know how to start approaching this matter. What do I do?
    7 answers · 7 hours ago