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  • How to not self sabatoge any potential relationship?

    I got hurt in the past and cannot learn to let my guard down. Even when I’m 

    Super into a guy I end up ruining it by giving off vibes that I’m not that into them (I.e not responding to messages or responding in a more friend way, avoiding hanging out with them or cutting things off when it gets too deep etc). I’m aware that I intentionally do this, however I don’t know how to stop. I’m so tired of being friend zoned but I honestly don’t know how to let anyone in. I’m too terrified to let my guard down because it took me a long time to rebuild myself after a really awful relationship from my past. I’ve turned 2-3 guys away that I think could’ve been really great for me because I couldn’t let my guard down. Instead I just act really cold hearted and have Been told sometimes it comes off as if I’m playing games... please help )’; 

    1 AnswerSingles & Dating4 months ago
  • How to casually date?

    I was in a relationship from ages 17-23 and am now 25. I’ve dated some since being single but I feel that I don’t really understand “casual dating.” Can someone explain how casual dating works? I 

    always feel obligated to consistently be in contact with a person after a date? Is it okay to just casually date a few people? What are the Rules with contacting them after a date? Can we text every once in a while or just send a message when we feel like meeting up with one another again?  Right now I’m not sure I’m ready to find someone to date seriously so I’d rather casually date but I’m not sure how to go about it 

    2 AnswersSingles & Dating4 months ago
  • How to know when it's time to seek help?

    For the longest time i've been the happy, bubbly, outgoing, peppy friend. A lot of my friends struggled with depression and I would always do my best to console them and help them through struggles but truly felt that it was hard for me to relate at times because it was never a feeling I experienced. I've always been terrified to have feelings of depression because severe mental health diseases run in my family. I think i've been feeling depressed over the past 2 or so years. My personality is still the same but I honestly feel like its just a front now. I've never felt so sad in my life and most days I lay in bed because I don't see the point in getting up. I feel so dumb for feeling this way because there's really nothing bad i've experienced in my life..but it's gotten even worse with the quarantine situation to the point where I've pretty much lost all interest in anything. When/how do you know it's time to seek professional help? 

    6 AnswersMental Health6 months ago
  • Men, what are reasons you send these late night messages to women you’re no longer with?

    I briefly dated a guy 6 months ago. It wasn’t serious and only lasted 1.5  months however we didn’t really end on bad terms. We’ve kept in slight contact via social media but haven’t really had a conversation since we ended things/ got closure around Christmas time. Our communication kinda fell through the last few weeks (i.e no longer snap chatting) He picked back up with them and then Friday night around 2-3 am he texted me (drunk) saying he missed me. In the morning he just said he was tipsy and he missed talking to me and that was the end of the convo... I’m assuming he’s lonely or bored or it was just a drunk mistake.. but I’m a bit confused on why he’s reaching out to me 6 months after the fact. Men why do you send messages like this? 

    Trying not to make it more than it is because it took me quite some time to get over this guy and I don’t want to fall back into it. 

    1 AnswerSingles & Dating7 months ago
  • Why do men send these texts late at night?

    I was "talking" to a guy back in the fall for about 1.5 months. Before we "dated," he chased me for 3 months prior before I agreed to meet up with him. Long story short, we clicked really well but both agreed it was bad timing & neither of us were really emotionally available for the direction the relationship was headed/things were moving really fast and neither of us were ready to be invested so we both kinda put our guards up and decided to end things. Last time I saw him in person, he gave me a Christmas present. We communicate through social media still briefly (i.e. sending snapchats, messaging over snap every so often, viewing each others stories). I had a really really hard time letting him go. The past few weeks I stopped snapping him (he wasn't snapping me either)  because I was really trying to distance myself and finally push past it. I finally felt like I was over it and this past week he's been sending me snaps again. Last night I received texts from him (i'm assuming they were drunk texts) at 2 and 3 am saying "hi" "hi i really miss u"..and then today he said "was tipsy, but I miss talking to you" I'm a bit confused, I'm kind of assuming it may have just been a booty call.. but he also knows i'm not that kind of girl at all. Men why do you do this/send messages like these? Trying to convince myself that he does not genuinely mean it so I don't fall back into a pattern...

    1 AnswerSingles & Dating7 months ago
  • What do men mean when they sent texts like this late at night?

    I was "talking"/dating a guy but we weren't exclusive back in the fall for about 1.5 months. Before we "dated," he chased me for 3 months prior before I agreed to meet up with him. Long story short, we clicked really well but both agreed it was bad timing, & neither of us were really emotionally available for the direction the relationship was headed/things were moving really fast and neither of us were ready to be invested so we both kinda put our guards up and decided to end things. Last time I saw him in person, he gave me a Christmas present. We've communicated through social media still briefly (i.e. sending snapchats, messaging over snap 2-3 times, viewing each others stories). I had a really really hard time letting him go. The past few weeks I stopped snapping him (he wasn't snapping me either) and viewed his stories later and later because I was really trying to distance myself and finally push past it. I finally felt like I was over it and this past week he's been sending me snaps again. Last night I received texts from him (i'm assuming they were drunk texts) at 2 and 3 am saying "hi" "hi i really miss u".. I'm a bit confused, I'm kind of assuming it may have just been a booty call.. but he also knows i'm not really that kind of girl at all. Men why do you do this? Trying to convince myself that he does not genuinely mean it so I don't fall back into a pattern...

    1 AnswerSingles & Dating7 months ago
  • How to politely tell friends that I can't help them with their problems?

    For the longest time I've been the friend that other friends have come to with their struggles, whether it be relationship problems, anxiety, depression, family issues..etc.. I've never had a problem helping my friends mostly because I hate to see them struggling..I think its the empath in me..however over the past year (and especially last 6 months) I've been struggling myself battling what I think may be on and off depressive episodes...it's something I have never experienced myself so I'm still figuring out how to help myself through these moments. However, I find myself still constantly being a support crutch for numerous friends and I feel so exhausted helping them that I let myself down because I'm afraid to ask for help/support in return and don't have the energy to battle my own problems.. how can I kindly tell my friends that I can't help them? I just feel so drained...

    2 AnswersFriends8 months ago
  • Is there something wrong with me?

    I’ve recently Gotten back out into the dating world.. the last few men I’ve met up with or talked to have said “how are you single?” And then when I ask them why they just say that I’m an attractive girl who is super easy to talk to and has their head on straight and a lot going for myself. After they say this they normally ask how long I’ve been single (1 yr). I’m always just trying to be myself but these men always end up ghosting me shortly asking me how I’m single.. can someone tell me what they’re thinking or why this keeps happening? 

    3 AnswersSingles & Dating8 months ago
  • How to know if you should seek counseling services from past relationships?

    I ended my 6 year relationship about a year ago. I have no feelings for my ex and really should have ended the relationship years before last year but I felt trapped and was scared to leave due to comfort. My ex screwed me up with a lot of emotional abuse and degrading my confidence that killed my body image/self confidence related to career/success. I’ve worked really hard over the last year to live healthier physically and put my energy into my dream job that I’m pursuing now as well as recentering on what I value as important. I constantly have his degrading comments in the back of my mind and as much as I hate to admit it they still hold a lot of power of me and my self image. I feel so stuck, how do you know if this is something I should seek counseling for? It doesn’t seem all that big because I know most people who seek these services are really struggling... but my friends say it may help because they see the toll he has left on me 

    3 AnswersMental Health8 months ago
  • Is it weird to still be triggered by things from a past relationship? ?

    I.e if someone calls you a nickname or does something your ex used to do that you didn’t like.. is it weird to feel triggered by that? I’m over my ex but he definitely wrecked me emotionally so I’m not sure if that has something to do with it 

    4 AnswersSingles & Dating8 months ago
  • how to truly get over the hurt from your past?

    I'm in my mid-twenties and spent 6 years with the wrong guy. I was cheated on and experienced a lot of emotional manipulation. I'm over my ex but I can't seem to move past all the damage they have caused. I have met a few good guys but I have so much trouble opening up/not being closed off due to fear of getting hurt & thinking to myself that its better to be alone because another person will probably end up hurting me anyway. I often end up self-sabotaging things with men by being distant/appearing disinterested. I'm aware that I do this but I don't know how to stop.  All of my friends are constantly asking why I'm single or why I haven't been into dating because they think I'm a great catch but I really am just so afraid. Will this ever end.. any advice on how to get over your past emotional damage/baggage? I understand that anybody my age probably has some type of baggage from a bad relationship so Im not trying to sound annoying. Should i just focus on being single right now?? Please help or give advice. I'm so tired of feeling this way

    2 AnswersSingles & Dating8 months ago
  • Advice.. would you stay true to yourself or begin to look at what you need to change?

    My personality is always getting me in trouble with men... and by in trouble I mean heart broken. I’m very outgoing and bubbly but also easy going. My ex of 6 years did some very sketchy things and emotionally wrecked me.. as I was breaking up with him he told me “I was so easy to take advantage of” because I was “chill” and trusted him (I never had a reason that I knew of not to). I’ve dated around since my ex some and guys are always telling me how refreshing it is that I’m not uptight/crazy.. however they always end up somehow playing me or taking advantage of my personality.. I’m so tired of being heart broken I feel like to survive in this day and age you have to be an uptight controlling b**** to men for them to actually like you... not really sure how but I feel like I have to change who I am because I’m so tired of being taken advantage of.. would it be dumb to start acting more closed off or controlling/bitchy to see if it’d solve my problem? 

    1 AnswerSingles & Dating8 months ago
  • Is this a bad reason to change the way you act towards men?

    My personality is always getting me in trouble with men... and by in trouble I mean heart broken. I’m very outgoing and bubbly but also easy going. My ex of 6 years did some very sketchy things and emotionally wrecked me.. as I was breaking up with him he told me “I was so easy to take advantage of” because I was “chill” and trusted him (I never had a reason that I knew of not to). I’ve dated around since my ex some and guys are always telling me how refreshing it is that I’m not uptight/crazy.. however they always end up somehow playing me or taking advantage of my personality.. I’m so tired of being heart broken I feel like to survive in this day and age you have to be an uptight controlling b**** to men for them to actually like you... not really sure how but I feel like I have to change who I am because I’m so tired of being taken advantage of.. would it be dumb to start acting more closed off or controlling/bitchy to see if it’d solve my problem? 

    1 AnswerSingles & Dating9 months ago
  • How to know if you were really in-love with someone?

    I dated someone for six years and now looking back on that relationship i'm not really sure I was "in-love." I feel so stupid for saying that but it's something I think about often. I was very young when first beginning to date my ex so I felt that I was in love (at least for the first two years)...but then somehow fell out of love. The last 3 years I was with him I felt like we had more of a friendship but I was afraid to leave due to the comfort/familiarity/routine of the relationship. Now I'm thinking that maybe I was just infatuated with the relationship and him at first and it wore off over time? How do you truly know if you were really in love with someone...?

    4 AnswersSingles & Dating10 months ago
  • Are dating apps worth downloading?

    I'm 24 and new to being single (haven't been single since 18). Dating is a whole new territory for me...especially being in my mid-twenties. I've been on a few dates, and gone through a few "talking" stages but none of it has worked out. I have yet to download a dating app..I just feel like everyone on them is looking for a casual hook-up or nudes or something...I'm not really sure what I'm looking for relationship wise but I'm not into casual hookups with strangers... is it worth it to download dating apps at the age of 24? 

    2 AnswersSingles & Dating10 months ago
  • Does love still really exist in this modern age? ?

    I have lost any actual belief that love exists. It seems like everyday I hear a new story of my friends being played, cheated on or broken up with form long/term relationships, I Ended a length relationship about 9 months ago after being cheated on and some other sketchy stuff happening, 

    three of my close friends parents have ended long marriages within the past two years due to infidelity and “lost love” does love really exist anymore? What makes you believe it? 

    2 AnswersSingles & Dating11 months ago
  • Do you believe in such a thing as “right person, wrong time”?

    Just curious.. is it possible to meet someone who is so so right for you but because of timing or other issues currently present in one or both partners lives that stops them from pursuing such a strong connection?? What’re your thoughts and/or opinions on right person wrong time?  Or would a strong connection be right no matter what.:.

    3 AnswersSingles & Dating12 months ago
  • Is there such thing as “right person wrong/bad timing”?

    Do you believe in this.. what’s your stance?

    1 AnswerSingles & Dating12 months ago
  • Question for men?

    If you don’t *** when given a handjob or bj does that mean it wasn’t good??

    2 AnswersSingles & Dating12 months ago
  • Why do men act so hot and cold?

    I don't understand men/dating. This guy pursued me from july-october trying to nonchalantly get me to go out on a date with him. I finally complied at the end of october. We went on about 6 dates in the course of a month. Ended up having sex, I told him I wasn't ready for anything serious but enjoyed his company, he said the same but would still put in a lot of effort into making plans with me and pursuing me. He would even say things to me as if he eventually thought we would date.. All the sudden he turned off his emotions and is acting odd towards me. I confronted him about it and he said he's not ready for anything emotional (which doesn't make sense because I wasn't asking him for that). I thought i'd give him space by not talking to him but then he ended up snap chatting and texting me and seemed mad that I didn't text back/respond for a day. Now we have been talking but it's a lot different than how it used to be. He seems uninterested... can someone explain this to me? Why are men so hot and cold? why is he continuing to message me if he seems so uninterested.

    3 AnswersSingles & Dating12 months ago