My mother was struggling with a fork for her tiny peas. This was non-formal dinner, just me, Mom and Dad (in bathrobe even). I told her- why not use a spoon?- as she was eating them one at a time, with many falling onto table or plate. She said she could not do that. I asked my family in an email if they all use forks only, even when dining alone, and some actually said they do! I was shocked. My family ignores "elbows on table" and totally ignores the fork in left hand, knife on right and other rules when dining informally. I think it is OCD (obsessive compulsive) to force yourself to struggle with a fork with baby peas, unless at a formal dinner (of course). But some in my family disagree and says this rule is somehow more important than others they choose to ignore when eating in private. What is the consensus out there? Spoon wrong? Or spoon optional?